Intermediate120 min
Wish, if only, should have
| Present | Past | |
|---|---|---|
| wish | wish + past simple or could | wish + past perfect |
| if only ... | if only + past simple or could | if only + past perfect |
| should (n't) have | should(n’t) + have + past participle |
wish
We use wish + past simple or could to talk about things we would like to be different in the present, when these things are impossible or unlikely to change.
I wish I had more time. (But I don’t have more time.)
I wish you were here. (But you aren’t here.)
We use wish + object + would to talk about something you want to stop happening in the present because it annoys you.
I wish they would be quiet at night. (But I don’t think they will.)
I wish you wouldn’t call me at weekends. (But I know you probably will continue to do it.)
Notice that we don’t use this structure to talk about ourselves.
NOT I wish I wouldn’t be so poor.
We use wish + past perfect to talk about things that happened or didn’t happen in the past, which we now regret and would like to change.
I wish I’d gone to university when I was younger. (I didn’t go to university and now I regret it.)
I wish they hadn’t moved away. I really miss them! (They moved, and now I feel sad about this.)
if only
We can use if only instead of wish in the structures above to show more emotion.
If only we lived by the sea!
If only the car would start!
If only he would be quiet!
If only I’d listened to my mother!
should have
We can also use should(n’t) have + past participle to talk about things in the past that we regret.
We should have arrived earlier. Now there are no seats.
I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that. I’m sorry.
We use wish + past simple or could to talk about things we would like to be different in the present, when these things are impossible or unlikely to change.
I wish I had more time. (But I don’t have more time.)
I wish you were here. (But you aren’t here.)
We use wish + object + would to talk about something you want to stop happening in the present because it annoys you.
I wish they would be quiet at night. (But I don’t think they will.)
I wish you wouldn’t call me at weekends. (But I know you probably will continue to do it.)
Notice that we don’t use this structure to talk about ourselves.
NOT I wish I wouldn’t be so poor.
We use wish + past perfect to talk about things that happened or didn’t happen in the past, which we now regret and would like to change.
I wish I’d gone to university when I was younger. (I didn’t go to university and now I regret it.)
I wish they hadn’t moved away. I really miss them! (They moved, and now I feel sad about this.)
if only
We can use if only instead of wish in the structures above to show more emotion.
If only we lived by the sea!
If only the car would start!
If only he would be quiet!
If only I’d listened to my mother!
should have
We can also use should(n’t) have + past participle to talk about things in the past that we regret.
We should have arrived earlier. Now there are no seats.
I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that. I’m sorry.
Quiz
Question 1 of 10
What is the correct form of the verb in the sentence: "She ____ to the store yesterday."?
go
goes
went
going
Life's Biggest Regrets
When we retrospectively examine our existence, certain profound reflections persistently resurface. Recent comprehensive research has illuminated the most prevalent regrets that permeate human consciousness, and these revelations can impart invaluable wisdom about cultivating more meaningful and fulfilling lives.
The Profound Regrets That Torment Our Souls
Capitulating to External Expectations
"I wish I'd had the tenacity to live authentically, not the façade others expected of me" is the paramount regret among individuals contemplating their life trajectory. Many people squander their entire existence attempting to placate others, but this sycophantic approach invariably backfires spectacularly. If only we could grasp earlier that authentic living demands unwavering fortitude. We should have followed our moral compass instead of perpetually seeking validation from family, peers, or societal conventions. This people-pleasing mentality often leaves us feeling like we've sold our soul for acceptance.
Romantic Opportunities That Slipped Through Our Fingers
Romantic regrets constitute America's most ubiquitous form of remorse, predominantly centering on squandered opportunities for potential liaisons and meaningful connections. People are perpetually haunted by thoughts like "I wish I had mustered the courage to bare my soul to her" or "If only I hadn't allowed my paralyzing fear of rejection to sabotage my chances." When it comes to matters of the heart, we frequently let golden opportunities slip through our fingers by failing to seize the moment. We should have thrown caution to the wind when Cupid came knocking instead of letting fear call the shots. Many realize too late that fortune favors the bold in love.
Cherished Friendships That Withered Away
Countless individuals had become so engrossed in their relentless pursuit of success that they inadvertently allowed precious friendships to deteriorate and eventually fall by the wayside. People belatedly recognize that they wish they had invested more earnest effort in maintaining contact with treasured companions from their past. If only we comprehended that tempus fugit - time flies when you're absorbed in life's minutiae, but it also evaporates when you're too preoccupied to cultivate meaningful relationships. We should have made it a point to reach out more frequently instead of assuming there would perpetually be another opportunity down the road. Many discover that friendship is like a delicate flower - without proper nurturing, it simply wilts away.
Professional Stagnation and Missed Opportunities
Empirical data reveals that mid-career professionals harbor the most profound regrets, with a staggering 70% of millennials and 69% of Generation X experiencing career-related disillusionment. Numerous individuals lament that they wish they had demonstrated more entrepreneurial audacity in their professional endeavors. "If only I had taken the plunge and launched my own enterprise" or "I should have pivoted careers when the iron was hot" are pervasive ruminations. We often take the path of least resistance and consequently forfeit opportunities that could have been game-changers in our professional trajectory. Many realize they've been playing it safe to their own detriment, choosing security over potentially revolutionary career moves.
Paralyzing Fear That Became Our Achilles' Heel
People frequently articulate profound regret that they "allowed trepidation to dictate my decisions and eschewed taking calculated risks". Fear can be an insidious dream crusher, systematically undermining our aspirations and preventing us from reaching our full potential. We wish we had been more intrepid and grasped the nettle instead of perpetually gravitating toward the well-trodden path. If only we had internalized earlier that the greatest hazard lies in complete risk aversion. Many come to understand that cowardice is the thief of opportunity, and that playing it safe can be the most perilous strategy of all.
The Proverbial Silver Lining
While these regrets are endemic to the human experience, there remains a glimmer of hope on the horizon. Approximately 90 percent of adults harbor profound regrets about their existential choices, yet dwelling obsessively on these shortcomings inexorably diminishes quality of life. The crux lies in extracting wisdom from these patterns without engaging in relentless self-flagellation. We should have recognized earlier that regret is an inevitable facet of the human condition, but it need not become the albatross around our neck that defines our future trajectory.
Charting a More Purposeful Course Forward
Comprehending these ubiquitous regrets can serve as a catalyst for more judicious decision-making in our remaining chapters. Rather than crying over spilled milk or beating a dead horse, we can harness this hard-won knowledge to live with greater intentionality and purpose. If only more individuals could glean wisdom from others' tribulations, we might circumvent some of these agonizing regrets ourselves. We should have possessed the prescience to act upon what truly matters before the window of opportunity closes indefinitely.
Bear in mind that it's never too late to change course and turn over a new leaf. While we cannot turn back the hands of time or put the genie back in the bottle, we can ensure we don't compound our existing regrets with additional poor choices. As the ancient proverb wisely states: the best time to plant a tree was two decades ago; the second-best time is at this very moment. Don't let perfect be the enemy of good - sometimes taking imperfect action is infinitely better than remaining paralyzed by indecision.
The Profound Regrets That Torment Our Souls
Capitulating to External Expectations
"I wish I'd had the tenacity to live authentically, not the façade others expected of me" is the paramount regret among individuals contemplating their life trajectory. Many people squander their entire existence attempting to placate others, but this sycophantic approach invariably backfires spectacularly. If only we could grasp earlier that authentic living demands unwavering fortitude. We should have followed our moral compass instead of perpetually seeking validation from family, peers, or societal conventions. This people-pleasing mentality often leaves us feeling like we've sold our soul for acceptance.
Romantic Opportunities That Slipped Through Our Fingers
Romantic regrets constitute America's most ubiquitous form of remorse, predominantly centering on squandered opportunities for potential liaisons and meaningful connections. People are perpetually haunted by thoughts like "I wish I had mustered the courage to bare my soul to her" or "If only I hadn't allowed my paralyzing fear of rejection to sabotage my chances." When it comes to matters of the heart, we frequently let golden opportunities slip through our fingers by failing to seize the moment. We should have thrown caution to the wind when Cupid came knocking instead of letting fear call the shots. Many realize too late that fortune favors the bold in love.
Cherished Friendships That Withered Away
Countless individuals had become so engrossed in their relentless pursuit of success that they inadvertently allowed precious friendships to deteriorate and eventually fall by the wayside. People belatedly recognize that they wish they had invested more earnest effort in maintaining contact with treasured companions from their past. If only we comprehended that tempus fugit - time flies when you're absorbed in life's minutiae, but it also evaporates when you're too preoccupied to cultivate meaningful relationships. We should have made it a point to reach out more frequently instead of assuming there would perpetually be another opportunity down the road. Many discover that friendship is like a delicate flower - without proper nurturing, it simply wilts away.
Professional Stagnation and Missed Opportunities
Empirical data reveals that mid-career professionals harbor the most profound regrets, with a staggering 70% of millennials and 69% of Generation X experiencing career-related disillusionment. Numerous individuals lament that they wish they had demonstrated more entrepreneurial audacity in their professional endeavors. "If only I had taken the plunge and launched my own enterprise" or "I should have pivoted careers when the iron was hot" are pervasive ruminations. We often take the path of least resistance and consequently forfeit opportunities that could have been game-changers in our professional trajectory. Many realize they've been playing it safe to their own detriment, choosing security over potentially revolutionary career moves.
Paralyzing Fear That Became Our Achilles' Heel
People frequently articulate profound regret that they "allowed trepidation to dictate my decisions and eschewed taking calculated risks". Fear can be an insidious dream crusher, systematically undermining our aspirations and preventing us from reaching our full potential. We wish we had been more intrepid and grasped the nettle instead of perpetually gravitating toward the well-trodden path. If only we had internalized earlier that the greatest hazard lies in complete risk aversion. Many come to understand that cowardice is the thief of opportunity, and that playing it safe can be the most perilous strategy of all.
The Proverbial Silver Lining
While these regrets are endemic to the human experience, there remains a glimmer of hope on the horizon. Approximately 90 percent of adults harbor profound regrets about their existential choices, yet dwelling obsessively on these shortcomings inexorably diminishes quality of life. The crux lies in extracting wisdom from these patterns without engaging in relentless self-flagellation. We should have recognized earlier that regret is an inevitable facet of the human condition, but it need not become the albatross around our neck that defines our future trajectory.
Charting a More Purposeful Course Forward
Comprehending these ubiquitous regrets can serve as a catalyst for more judicious decision-making in our remaining chapters. Rather than crying over spilled milk or beating a dead horse, we can harness this hard-won knowledge to live with greater intentionality and purpose. If only more individuals could glean wisdom from others' tribulations, we might circumvent some of these agonizing regrets ourselves. We should have possessed the prescience to act upon what truly matters before the window of opportunity closes indefinitely.
Bear in mind that it's never too late to change course and turn over a new leaf. While we cannot turn back the hands of time or put the genie back in the bottle, we can ensure we don't compound our existing regrets with additional poor choices. As the ancient proverb wisely states: the best time to plant a tree was two decades ago; the second-best time is at this very moment. Don't let perfect be the enemy of good - sometimes taking imperfect action is infinitely better than remaining paralyzed by indecision.
Retrospectively - looking back on past events with understanding or knowledge
Permeate - to spread throughout; penetrate completely
Illuminated - made clear; provided insight into
Capitulating - giving in; surrendering to pressure
Tenacity - persistence; determination
Façade - false appearance; pretense
Paramount - most important; supreme
Sycophantic - behaving in an obsequious way to gain advantage
Placate - to make less angry; appease
Fortitude - courage in facing difficulty
Ubiquitous - present everywhere; very common
Liaisons - close relationships; connections
Muster - to gather or summon (courage, strength)
Sabotage - to deliberately destroy or damage
Engrossed - completely absorbed in
Deteriorate - to become progressively worse
Belatedly - arriving or happening late
Minutiae - small, precise details
Preoccupied - absorbed with thoughts
Empirical - based on observation or experience
Disillusionment - disappointment from discovering reality
Audacity - boldness; daring
Pivoted - changed direction decisively
Pervasive - spreading widely throughout
Forfeit - lose or give up as penalty
Trajectory - path or course of development
Eschewed - deliberately avoided
Insidious - proceeding gradually but harmfully
Intrepid - fearless; adventurous
Trepidation - anxiety; nervousness
Endemic - regularly occurring in a particular place
Inexorably - in a way that cannot be stopped
Self-flagellation - harsh self-criticism
Albatross - burden; source of frustration
Judicious - showing good judgment
Tribulations - troubles; suffering
Circumvent - find a way around; avoid
Prescience - knowledge of future events
Compound - make worse by adding to
Idioms & Expressions:
Sell your soul - sacrifice principles for gain
Slip through fingers - lose an opportunity
Bare your soul - reveal deepest feelings
Throw caution to the wind - act recklessly/boldly
Cupid came knocking - romantic opportunity arose
Let fear call the shots - allow fear to control decisions
Fortune favors the bold - brave people are more likely to succeed
Fall by the wayside - be abandoned or forgotten
Tempus fugit - time flies (Latin phrase)
Down the road - in the future
Take the plunge - make a bold decision
When the iron was hot - at the most opportune moment
Path of least resistance - easiest course of action
Game-changer - something that significantly alters a situation
Achilles' heel - a person's weakness or vulnerable point
Dream crusher - something that destroys aspirations
Grasp the nettle - tackle a difficult situation boldly
Well-trodden path - commonly chosen route
Thief of opportunity - something that steals chances
Glimmer of hope - small sign of improvement
On the horizon - approaching in the future
Albatross around neck - persistent burden
Crying over spilled milk - regretting past mistakes
Beating a dead horse - continuing a futile effort
Hard-won knowledge - wisdom gained through difficulty
Window of opportunity - limited time to act
Turn over a new leaf - start fresh; reform
Turn back hands of time - undo the past (impossible)
Put genie back in bottle - undo something (impossible)
Don't let perfect be enemy of good - don't avoid action waiting for perfection
Permeate - to spread throughout; penetrate completely
Illuminated - made clear; provided insight into
Capitulating - giving in; surrendering to pressure
Tenacity - persistence; determination
Façade - false appearance; pretense
Paramount - most important; supreme
Sycophantic - behaving in an obsequious way to gain advantage
Placate - to make less angry; appease
Fortitude - courage in facing difficulty
Ubiquitous - present everywhere; very common
Liaisons - close relationships; connections
Muster - to gather or summon (courage, strength)
Sabotage - to deliberately destroy or damage
Engrossed - completely absorbed in
Deteriorate - to become progressively worse
Belatedly - arriving or happening late
Minutiae - small, precise details
Preoccupied - absorbed with thoughts
Empirical - based on observation or experience
Disillusionment - disappointment from discovering reality
Audacity - boldness; daring
Pivoted - changed direction decisively
Pervasive - spreading widely throughout
Forfeit - lose or give up as penalty
Trajectory - path or course of development
Eschewed - deliberately avoided
Insidious - proceeding gradually but harmfully
Intrepid - fearless; adventurous
Trepidation - anxiety; nervousness
Endemic - regularly occurring in a particular place
Inexorably - in a way that cannot be stopped
Self-flagellation - harsh self-criticism
Albatross - burden; source of frustration
Judicious - showing good judgment
Tribulations - troubles; suffering
Circumvent - find a way around; avoid
Prescience - knowledge of future events
Compound - make worse by adding to
Idioms & Expressions:
Sell your soul - sacrifice principles for gain
Slip through fingers - lose an opportunity
Bare your soul - reveal deepest feelings
Throw caution to the wind - act recklessly/boldly
Cupid came knocking - romantic opportunity arose
Let fear call the shots - allow fear to control decisions
Fortune favors the bold - brave people are more likely to succeed
Fall by the wayside - be abandoned or forgotten
Tempus fugit - time flies (Latin phrase)
Down the road - in the future
Take the plunge - make a bold decision
When the iron was hot - at the most opportune moment
Path of least resistance - easiest course of action
Game-changer - something that significantly alters a situation
Achilles' heel - a person's weakness or vulnerable point
Dream crusher - something that destroys aspirations
Grasp the nettle - tackle a difficult situation boldly
Well-trodden path - commonly chosen route
Thief of opportunity - something that steals chances
Glimmer of hope - small sign of improvement
On the horizon - approaching in the future
Albatross around neck - persistent burden
Crying over spilled milk - regretting past mistakes
Beating a dead horse - continuing a futile effort
Hard-won knowledge - wisdom gained through difficulty
Window of opportunity - limited time to act
Turn over a new leaf - start fresh; reform
Turn back hands of time - undo the past (impossible)
Put genie back in bottle - undo something (impossible)
Don't let perfect be enemy of good - don't avoid action waiting for perfection
Chunking in idioms
What is Chunking in Idioms?
Chunking in idioms refers to the practice of combining multiple idiomatic expressions within a single sentence or paragraph to create more colorful, natural-sounding English. Instead of using just one idiom at a time, advanced speakers "chunk" several idioms together to make their language more expressive and fluent.
Think of it like building with blocks - you don't just use one block, you stack multiple blocks together to create something more impressive and sturdy.
Why Do Native Speakers Use Chunking?
1. Natural Flow
Native speakers don't think "Now I'll use one idiom." Instead, idioms flow naturally in their speech because they think in chunks of language rather than individual words.
2. Emphasis and Impact
Using multiple idioms creates stronger emotional impact and makes the message more memorable.
3. Cultural Expression
Idioms carry cultural meaning, so using several together shows deep understanding of the language and culture.
How Chunking Works in Practice
Example 1: Simple vs. Chunked
Simple: "He was very busy with work and lost touch with his friends."
Chunked: "He was so wrapped up in climbing the corporate ladder that he burned bridges with old friends and before he knew it, he was left high and dry."
Analysis:
"wrapped up in" = completely absorbed in
"climbing the corporate ladder" = advancing in career
"burned bridges" = damaged relationships
"left high and dry" = abandoned without help
Example 2: Regret Expression
Simple: "I wish I had been braver in love."
Chunked: "I wish I had bit the bullet and worn my heart on my sleeve instead of sitting on the fence - you can't win if you don't play, and now that ship has sailed."
Analysis:
"bit the bullet" = faced something difficult courageously
"worn my heart on my sleeve" = showed emotions openly
"sitting on the fence" = being indecisive
"you can't win if you don't play" = you must take risks to succeed
"that ship has sailed" = the opportunity is gone
Common Chunking Patterns
Pattern 1: Cause and Effect Chain
Structure: Action idiom + Consequence idiom + Result idiom
Example: "He bit off more than he could chew (action), burned the candle at both ends (consequence), and eventually hit rock bottom (result)."
Pattern 2: Contrast Pattern
Structure: Negative idiom + "instead of" + Positive idiom
Example: "She was penny-wise but pound-foolish instead of seeing the bigger picture."
Pattern 3: Progression Pattern
Structure: Starting idiom + Development idiom + Ending idiom
Example: "At first, everything was smooth sailing, but then we hit a rough patch, and now we're back to square one."
Rules for Effective Chunking
DO:
✅ Use idioms that logically connect
Good: "He jumped the gun and put all his eggs in one basket" (both about taking risks)
Bad: "She spilled the beans about beating around the bush" (no logical connection)
✅ Maintain the same tone/register
Formal: "He was between a rock and a hard place, so he had to bite the bullet"
Informal: "She was in a pickle, so she decided to wing it"
✅ Use transitional phrases
"Before you know it..."
"At the end of the day..."
"When push comes to shove..."
DON'T:
❌ Overdo it - More than 3-4 idioms in one sentence becomes confusing
❌ Mix metaphors awkwardly
Bad: "Don't count your chickens before they cross the bridge"
❌ Use conflicting meanings
Bad: "Time flies when you're having fun, but a watched pot never boils" (contradictory messages about time)
Chunking in idioms refers to the practice of combining multiple idiomatic expressions within a single sentence or paragraph to create more colorful, natural-sounding English. Instead of using just one idiom at a time, advanced speakers "chunk" several idioms together to make their language more expressive and fluent.
Think of it like building with blocks - you don't just use one block, you stack multiple blocks together to create something more impressive and sturdy.
Why Do Native Speakers Use Chunking?
1. Natural Flow
Native speakers don't think "Now I'll use one idiom." Instead, idioms flow naturally in their speech because they think in chunks of language rather than individual words.
2. Emphasis and Impact
Using multiple idioms creates stronger emotional impact and makes the message more memorable.
3. Cultural Expression
Idioms carry cultural meaning, so using several together shows deep understanding of the language and culture.
How Chunking Works in Practice
Example 1: Simple vs. Chunked
Simple: "He was very busy with work and lost touch with his friends."
Chunked: "He was so wrapped up in climbing the corporate ladder that he burned bridges with old friends and before he knew it, he was left high and dry."
Analysis:
"wrapped up in" = completely absorbed in
"climbing the corporate ladder" = advancing in career
"burned bridges" = damaged relationships
"left high and dry" = abandoned without help
Example 2: Regret Expression
Simple: "I wish I had been braver in love."
Chunked: "I wish I had bit the bullet and worn my heart on my sleeve instead of sitting on the fence - you can't win if you don't play, and now that ship has sailed."
Analysis:
"bit the bullet" = faced something difficult courageously
"worn my heart on my sleeve" = showed emotions openly
"sitting on the fence" = being indecisive
"you can't win if you don't play" = you must take risks to succeed
"that ship has sailed" = the opportunity is gone
Common Chunking Patterns
Pattern 1: Cause and Effect Chain
Structure: Action idiom + Consequence idiom + Result idiom
Example: "He bit off more than he could chew (action), burned the candle at both ends (consequence), and eventually hit rock bottom (result)."
Pattern 2: Contrast Pattern
Structure: Negative idiom + "instead of" + Positive idiom
Example: "She was penny-wise but pound-foolish instead of seeing the bigger picture."
Pattern 3: Progression Pattern
Structure: Starting idiom + Development idiom + Ending idiom
Example: "At first, everything was smooth sailing, but then we hit a rough patch, and now we're back to square one."
Rules for Effective Chunking
DO:
✅ Use idioms that logically connect
Good: "He jumped the gun and put all his eggs in one basket" (both about taking risks)
Bad: "She spilled the beans about beating around the bush" (no logical connection)
✅ Maintain the same tone/register
Formal: "He was between a rock and a hard place, so he had to bite the bullet"
Informal: "She was in a pickle, so she decided to wing it"
✅ Use transitional phrases
"Before you know it..."
"At the end of the day..."
"When push comes to shove..."
DON'T:
❌ Overdo it - More than 3-4 idioms in one sentence becomes confusing
❌ Mix metaphors awkwardly
Bad: "Don't count your chickens before they cross the bridge"
❌ Use conflicting meanings
Bad: "Time flies when you're having fun, but a watched pot never boils" (contradictory messages about time)